XCESSIVE GAMER- Game Girls Page

Game Over:
Polygon girls take control

Women, heed this warning: You are facing a tough competition. This girl stealing your boyfriend’s attention is more dangerous than Monica Lewinski and Lorena Bobbit put together. Her body puts Barbie to shame. Her legs are long and athletic. Her breasts know not the afflictions of gravity. Her mind is as clever and sharp as it needs to be. She is flexible, she is fast, she is strong. She is the Video Game Girl.

A MULTI-TALENTED PERSON
The Video Game Girl has many faces, many hobbies and many facets to her character. As Laura, she travels through space in “Enemy Zero.” As Claire, she defies zombies in “Resident Evil 2.” As Red Lotus, she faces the monsters of “Deathtrap Dungeon.” As Lara Croft, she is cunning and deadly beautiful as she searches for ancient artifacts in “Tomb Raider.” As Aeris or Tifa, she is caring, affectionate and selfless in “Final Fantasy 7.”

But it is in the fighting arena that the Video Game Girl seems to excel. Male fighters have quickly learned not to underestimate the sexy looks of Chun-Li and Cammy in “Street Fighter II,” the luscious body of Mai Shiranui in “Fatal Fury,” the girl-next-door face of Sonya Blade and the mysterious appeal of Kitana in “Mortal Kombat 3.”The list is never ending: Sarah in “Virtua Fighter 2”; Anna and Nina Williams in “Tekken 2”; Seung Mina and Taki in “Soul Blade”; June in “Star Gladiator,” on and on and on...

Yes, she is hard to compete with, that Video Game Girl. But don’t blame your boyfriend for his roving eyes. The Video Game Girl might be made only of sprites or polygons, but she knows how to dress and act sexy.

Look at Chun-Li’s outfit, a kimono-like dress with slits so high on each side that the flaps always manage to reveal her fishnet-covered behind. How about Mai? Her kimono barely covers her breasts, which some say are her most dangerous weapons. Meanwhile, Anna wriggles like an exotic dancer during her victory poses. Red Lotus fights dragons in a skimpy dominatrix leather outfit. And of course, let’s not forget Lara Croft’s skin-tight T-shirt. ... What a tease!

REALITY CHECK
Screaming “But she is not real!” won’t do you any good. The Hollywood Woman isn’t real either, but that has never stopped your boyfriend from entertaining wild thoughts about his favorite actress.

The Video Game Girl has one weakness, though. She is becoming a stereotype of herself with each incarnation. Oh, she tries to look different, once blonde, once with long flowing red hair, once Chinese, once American. But in the end, she always fits in the same mold: a strong-minded woman who is not shy about showing the gifts Mother Nature bestowed upon her.

And lately, game programmers have been having fun with another gimmick that is sure to have male players flocking to their controllers:
BOUNCING
Yes, you’ve read right. Just like her human counterpart’s, the Video Game Girl’s body will, er, sway as she walks, jumps, and does whatever else a Video Game Girl does in the hands of hormone-intoxicated players. That phenomenon started small with Cammy in “Super Street Fighter II,” grew to comic proportions with Mai in “Fatal Fury,” and is eminently displayed with Taki in “Soul Blade.” Tecmo carries the torch in the home conversion of its 3-D arcade fighter “Dead or Alive,” which features a larger than usual cast of well-endowed female characters. The game producer himself said that bouncing was definitely going to be part of the game dynamics. Granted, it’s a little ridiculous, but you’ve got to admit the idea is hilarious — and games are about having a good time, right? One has to wonder what will come next, though. Maybe players will be able to shower and dress their characters before a fight...?

ARTISTIC FREEDOM
Technology has allowed programmers’ long-contained artistic talents to burst free. Remember, not too long ago, they were confined to animating little squares that beeped. But now, they can do pretty much whatever they want. And since the greatest majority of gamers is male, well, we get lots of games with good looking female characters. Sex has always sold well and will forever remain the greatest motivation in human
behavior.

But in the end, is the Video Game Girl dangerous? Does she hurt the image of flesh-and-blood women? Conservatives and feminists think so, and perhaps they’re right. But really, it comes down to knowing the difference between reality and fantasy.

So guys, use your common sense and wipe that drool off your lips before your girlfriend sees it. Buy her some flowers and take her out for dinner, not to the arcades.

And girls, it might help your relationships if you learned to throw a fireball.

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ARTICLE BY: DIDIER BAHUAUD
For Playstation games reviews and tips, original comic book art and (hopefully) humorous columns, visit Didier's World at:

http://www.iland.net/~dda

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